Monday, October 24

Committing Suicide ...In Style

When I was young and full of hope I always thought that if I ever met someone who was seriously contemplating suicide I'd give them the following advice:

                 Sell everything you have and travel.  
                 It doesn't matter where, 
                 just somewhere different than where you are now, 
                 but preferably as far away as possible.  

For a start, they'd have nothing left to lose and by the time they'd have seen a bunch of new things and gained some new and notable experiences, all from making a darkly brave leap of faith, they might have found they have changed their minds.  And if not, well, they have at least enjoyed the last moments they had alive as best they could.

It wasn't until I was sitting in a magnificent pancake restaurant in Prague, at the end of a one-month solo road trip through Europe that I realised, 20 years later, I had taken my own advice.  The only real difference is that humanity had decided to commit suicide on my behalf, on a collective scale through our continual abuse of the planet, and while I hadn't liked that decision I found myself at the mercy of the non-political democracy of our combined actions, and eventually... begrudgingly... I came to accept it.

I wasn't about to directly commit suicide, I merely had to wait around until humanity did that grisly task for me.  Besides which, not only am I too much of a coward to do such a thing, but I'm also far too morbidly curious to miss out on any of the gruesome details the global, civilisation-wide demise has in store for us.  It's going to be quite a show, so... why not order the banana, chocolate, nuts & eggnog crepe?  And that's exactly what I'm eating right now as I'm staring out of the window watching the rain gently fall outside from this restaurant's warm and cozy atmosphere.  What a beautiful way to end my life. a Civilisation Tourist.

This is a term I just made up, by the way.  Much like the term, Eco-Tourist, where people flock to places of natural wonder before Climate Change sees that beauty vanish forever, a Civilisation Tourist sees the best of what human civilisation has to offer before we're reduced to fighting over water and eating our pets, trying to remember what fish tasted like, or when the weather used to be nice.

Mmm... These pancakes are excellent!

1 comment:

keith vansickle said...

Yep 👍🏽